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How to stay strong in uncertainty

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Is it March Madness in your neck of the woods?

That's a loaded question over here at our humble abode on Long Island.

As our oldest is graduating from college (fingers quadruple crossed) and the youngest deciding what's next after high school, there's so much uncertainty these days about how life will unfold for them.

I find myself reaching for prayers and mantras to comfort me and ground me to hope. I was surprised by how good reciting the Serenity Prayer felt one afternoon after my teen's emotional episode.

What's pulling on your heart strings today? My goal is to connect with you as a woman, mom, caretaker and friend and to let you know that you're not alone. My wish is to leave you feeling encouraged and armed with a tool to cope and even thrive through this life.

I've put off this blog for quite some time trying to decide how much I could share about our journey down the road of coping with mental illness. We're in year 3 of learning how to grow our

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resilience, communication and a host of other skills after our child was diagnosed with anxiety, depression and a few other possible disorders that are too early to diagnose.

There I said it. Yes, we're one of the statistics you've read about whose child has suffered gravely from the affects of the pandemic. It feels good to let it out. I urge you to try if there's something you've been holding in all to yourself.

I keep learning that it's my desire to control everything that causes the most suffering. If I could just trust that every human being, including my own family, needs to learn their own lessons so they can grow. My breathwork and mindfulness training has truly been a blessing for me to find the joy and peace in each day.

What helps you to keep all the balls in the air with ease? I'm really am curious - please share.

So the question keeps coming up for me from my inner judge: "How can you still go out there and run your business, or make time for your friends and exercise and even have hysterically fun times with your husband while your child is spiraling into the unknown depths of another diagnosis?" How could I do such a thing? How could I ensure that my oxygen mask is duct taped on while she can barely breathe? How can I not?

Who is that voice anyway? Do you have a judgy voice that questions what you do all of the time? Yeah woman - I know that voice and often, it sounds like my mom and other times it's a mean version of myself. I've learned to recognize that scared voice who cares what everyone else thinks and doesn't really care much about what I need.

Thank you God that I have been and continue to do the work on loving myself so I can shut that voice down real quick when the madness starts spewing! It takes lots of practice. Lots!

My answer: I matter! If mama doesn't heal, then the whole world will be contaminated and so I give myself permission to heal and take the time that I need. To hire 3 support coaches - a wellness coach and a life coach and mentor! Yes! I'm surrounding myself with advocates so I can say what I need to say, be heard and be reminded of my greatness and also be held accountable to take action on my promises. I'm also a part of a NAMI (National Alliance on Mental Illness) www.nami.org support group to be connected with others going through similar challenges.

Whose in your corner love remind you of your greatness and what's going right? You don't have to do it alone. If you're craving support with learning how to create boundaries so you can stop living in the chaos of giving all your time away with nothing left for yourself, reach out. I'm keeping my client load at a manageable number so I can feel good about all of it. Let's talk if it intrigues you to connect.

What will you do now? If anything I've shared resonates with you, please email me back and let me know. I'd love to hear how my super power - vulnerability - created something good for you. Yeah - come on, show me some love if you're feeling like you can do this thing called life and know you're not alone.

Ohhhhh btw, almost forgot, I'm teaching intenSati for FREE on Fridays at 10 am EST for 45 minutes. Join me on Zoom and generate some serious love and appreciation for your life and purpose while working that gorgeous body of yours! Email me for the link @ youmatter@yvettegormanholmes.com - it's free for Women's Month!

You Matter Girlfriend!

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